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you ever spend a while cooking up really beautiful food and just think god i should start a mukbang channel just so other people know i am good at this shit sometimes lmao
too blitzed out
Aug. 7th, 2019 09:20 pmWhy yes! I am hoping to uninstall my chakras soon!
They are just one more avenue that the unsavory can use to bother me. What a hassle!
Don't worry, it isn't scary. It is like deleting your facebook or smacking your gum really loud in small indoor spaces — just a good old fashioned INTERACTION DETERRENT. I can't wait!!!
They are just one more avenue that the unsavory can use to bother me. What a hassle!
Don't worry, it isn't scary. It is like deleting your facebook or smacking your gum really loud in small indoor spaces — just a good old fashioned INTERACTION DETERRENT. I can't wait!!!
there's a lot going on right now
Jul. 25th, 2019 04:17 pmokay but have you ever thought of this?
corn tortilla chips
without salt
no salt at all anywhere!
none no
corn tortilla chips
without salt
no salt at all anywhere!
none no
this is rly intensely gross and also disgusting and certainly [synonym for gross and disgusting] just warning you before you keep reading BUT i keep getting nose bleeds bc it's so fucking dry and sometimes i gotta spit out the lil chunks that coagulate in my throat and the one i just spit onto a paper towel straight up looked like a heart and my first stupid ass thought was lmao that's my aesthetic at work
breaking news: i think our intern is a robot
i have rarely had time to go to the theater lately honestly, but somehow it ends up around lunch that i was the only one in the office besides the intern. he's rly shy so i'm trying to be accommodating and also am a lil bit like "lmao i remember that was me however many years ago when i was an intern and had no idea how they ran shit here" so i have empathy.
he shows up at the door, and like decides to leave before i can even get my headphones off to hear him oops. but then he's back in a minute, this time with his laptop.
"tina asked me to submit this thing. but uh i can't figure out" and he points to the last field in the online form asking for a super easy to read captcha of four letters. like a rude ass bitch my first patronizing internal thought was like 'wow this kid rly hasn't used the internet often enough to know what a captcha is?'
i just kinda go "oh let's see if it's" tick tack tick tick, click enter and ta da thanks for your submission :)
and he's like "oh. that like. worked." lmao and then thanked me and left. and i went back to work for a few minutes before i suddenly remembered oh wait! doesn't captcha literally exist as an anti-bot spam measure? straight up just forgot after years of exposure whoops
i have rarely had time to go to the theater lately honestly, but somehow it ends up around lunch that i was the only one in the office besides the intern. he's rly shy so i'm trying to be accommodating and also am a lil bit like "lmao i remember that was me however many years ago when i was an intern and had no idea how they ran shit here" so i have empathy.
he shows up at the door, and like decides to leave before i can even get my headphones off to hear him oops. but then he's back in a minute, this time with his laptop.
"tina asked me to submit this thing. but uh i can't figure out" and he points to the last field in the online form asking for a super easy to read captcha of four letters. like a rude ass bitch my first patronizing internal thought was like 'wow this kid rly hasn't used the internet often enough to know what a captcha is?'
i just kinda go "oh let's see if it's" tick tack tick tick, click enter and ta da thanks for your submission :)
and he's like "oh. that like. worked." lmao and then thanked me and left. and i went back to work for a few minutes before i suddenly remembered oh wait! doesn't captcha literally exist as an anti-bot spam measure? straight up just forgot after years of exposure whoops
i am so glad i ALKALIZED MY VESSEL for now i can eat an entire pineapple in one sitting, which i have always wished i could do! i also wake up with slightly fresher breath in the mornings than i once did. that will just come in the handiest if i ever desire to smooch another person who also has an ALKALIZED VESSEL before we have the mind to brush our goddamn teeth in the early morning hours :)
i am so glad i tried it! ALKALIZE YOUR VESSEL today!!!
i am so glad i tried it! ALKALIZE YOUR VESSEL today!!!
also i'm just saying re: my last post, rereading over the chapters i did publish and all the tidbits i rambled on about here and there and all my stupid half-written scenes all shoved into one lengthy word doc for my own reference, every few paragraphs i'm sitting here saying to my damn self:
oh my god
i am so fuckin funny honestly
oh my god
i am so fuckin funny honestly
there are all sorts of obscure ass emojis out there, but there isn't one of somebody sobbing while also blowing a kiss of gratitude and humility
c'mon universal emoji committee, cater to me personally already?
c'mon universal emoji committee, cater to me personally already?
*sees somebody wash their hands with soap and water* oh thank god
you ever have those moments where something aaalmost! happens and you're relieved it didn't but you also have a subtle sinking feeling that in another parallel universe it did it totally happened you knocked your entire lunch over the balcony and you even have the urge to go clean it up but you can't bc wrong timeline!
(no subject)
Jun. 21st, 2018 11:19 ami'm watching these kids run around all morning long and i'm dying just watchng them and i keep asking myself "did i sweat this much when i was a kid"
okay no spoilers but i honestly have never given an actual real shit about robots until i started watching lost in space on netflix w my dad and omg every episode i'm like "but the robot!!!" "be nice to that robot!" "um the robot could fix this hullo" "where tf is the robot!????!?!?!?"
(no subject)
Apr. 17th, 2018 03:32 pmjust saying but if you already kind of hate a person, having to share a bathroom w them is definitely not going to help the situation lmao
(no subject)
Apr. 6th, 2018 11:45 am
sometimes my google news recs are corny shit like "yoona is a goddess and also the reason anyone has short hair bc she invented the look" and i'm just like yes, google, this is exactly the kind if headline i want to casually read while typing my search queriesbut then sometimes it gives me useless whiplash like this and idk how many soshi fluff headlines can make up for it smh
whoever i start dating is gonna need to be okay w the fact that most good pet names out there i've already designated for my actual cat
me to myself when i see a cute enamel pin in my etsy recs: wow that's cute. oh wow that's really cute. like i actually really like this i want this i would literally buy this right now this very second omg it's so cute
me a whole three seconds later after clicking through to the listing and seeing the seller named the item something edgy and also phallic for literally no reason: hmmm yea nevermind
me a whole three seconds later after clicking through to the listing and seeing the seller named the item something edgy and also phallic for literally no reason: hmmm yea nevermind
youtube comments sections are strange and messy places but in all my years two entire individual comments have benefited me in my life - once by prompting me to research a particular physical health symptom that i thought was just a random genetic anomaly, another time passive-aggressively leading me to another channel's video w more comprehensive instructions on a cooking feat i was undertaking than the instructions in the video i found the comment on - so i have little motivation to stop scrolling down. especially in mobile bc i can see the video and comments at the same time!
