i like just the way you are

when i live in a mansion this won't matter as much but right now it does and so i am in communication w da Spirit of Spider™ in an effort to express dominion over my tiny ass living space! i know it's getting chilly outside but no spiders are allowed in my room. and i ended up yelling at this spider on my wall saying that if i really truly absolutely need to be seeing a spider around, for some fancy cosmic reason, they can show up

• in the living room or literally any other room in the house besides where i SLEEP
• at work (it's a historic building! that's more of a spider's aesthetic if you ask me)
• in spooky halloween decor, let's get festive b
• scrolling through stock photography. that's happened already
• vriska memes
• yea i really did say vriska memes didn't i smh

i like. really love venus. have i said this before? am i being too subtle with my adoration? she is like my mirror on the ceiing of every space i enter, but she is also my escort across the ether. or maybe chaperone is a more apt term haha. she accompanies me when i am not so confident that i can hold my own to the harsher company (@ saturn luv and respect you but god could you lighten up sometimes). but i also ask her to tag along when i'm doing some of the more run of the mill interactions and she stands behind me nodding at everything i say like the best wingwoman.

i asked jupiter for something the other day. it's a bit of a long term situation, which i've never done before with jupiter. but still... who needs a babysitter when talking to jupiter? i do, because i don't wanna step on any toes or harsh my networking! so venus comes along, because i ask her to, and just sits off to the side rolling her eyes because i am doing just fine by myself but babe i just want you there when i do shit okay!?

tbh sometimes i kinda 👀 at the moon and i'm like "hm can i trust her?"

and venus, my lady, my matron, my full frontal hoe, is straight up like "honestly? idk. but i fucks w her"

and the sun, my dear, my center, my light, is like "aw she doesn't mean to lie. her feelings becoming reality is sometimes her whole lesson."

and really that is enough for me except that it is not enough for me

i think the moon and i have to have an awkward coffee shop heart to heart that i'm looking to hold off as long as i can

the tarot, for like the past five days in a row each time i ask about A Girl: like she digs you but she's not gonna do anything about it and frankly you've got a hundred more important things to worry about than her flaky and oblivious ass

me, indignant and affection starved: we both know you're right but just in case she changes her mind imma ask again tomorrow js

heyyyyyyyyy and word to anybody wanting to undertake the whole past trauma resoving journey dealio like i've been doing lately: it's great! highly reccomend! if i was any less preoccupied w how nice i feel and being able to do shit i never could before bc i was so fucked up in dumb ways over limiting ass shit i'd say "wish i'd done so sooner!"

however, i do believe having to revisit young me numerous times in the past few weeks, and then throwing in generational junk while i was at it, kindaaa screwed w my perception of time lmao. ( twilight zone theme plays )

STORYTIME: I GAVE MYSELF SPIRITUAL FOOD POISONING (LIKE IT WAS NORMAL FOOD POISONING, BUT IT CAME LIKE SPIRITUALLY OR W/E) ( am i a legit youtuber yet )

 "if you thank them it'll totally freak them out"

so i did. i said thank you for reminding me of how far i've come, how much progress i've made and how i'm that much closer to being exactly where i want to truly be, for bringing me back to where i was for a moment in order to remind me of the gratitude i have for where i am now

hey here's a super universal and relatable feel: when you promised a deity to use an amount of money you asked of her for purchasing specific thing, part of which includes items in your etsy cart, and she totally pulled through but now your stalling a lil bc you're going back and forth between different specific items of the same concept just bc now that you're here and the purchase is here you wanna make real sure that this particular item clearly communicates to my target audience that i absolutely want pretty and funny and sweet ladies to flirt w me and maybe also marry me hey girl wassup call me