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Jul. 29th, 2024 11:15 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
venusundaesomething might have just happened in the world. or maybe just my household. but that's a pretty significant world to me.
i don't know yet what it means. but i thought i should write it down.
the facts of the situation are that my roommate E went outside. then we both went outside and chatted for a few minutes. now we're inside again, though changed.
the messages of the day kinda go like this...
a few months ago my mom performed a limpia on me in my living room, waving an egg around my body to cleanse my spirit of whatever shouldn't be there. my friend A was there. as waves of discomfort overwhelmed my body and erupted out of me in shrieks and yelling and groans of irritation, whatever we are cleansing, it's stubborn and ingrown. even my mother was moved to vomiting into our toilet about it.
that's a new one. thank you~
halfway through, my mom points at A and without even looking towards them commands they get a twig from the backyard. Preferably with leaves. And don't kill anyone! A doesn't even miss a beat, immediately running outside easily understanding that they were meant to pick one already fallen and not harm a currently living plant.
after the ritual we thanked our perfect little twig volunteer. my mother told me to put it above my door and just say thank you to it when you think of it and get rid of it in a few days.
i am grateful. i did say thank you a few times. but i also totally forgot it there for months.
today. i am sitting on my bed playing phone games and winding down. it's 10 at night. the town is going to bed.
and my little twig gives me a ring.
i suddenly have the impulse to take the twig back outside finally. and i'm even told where to place her.
i ignore it for now because i have 30 seconds left of this level and it's beeping urgently at me and if it's important then i will still remember it in a bit hold on!
then i heard our backyard door open.
okay fine. message heard.
i did finish the level tho.
but i also call out to my roommate. i almost didn't. felt nonsensical maybe. turns out she also felt a seemingly out of nowhere urge to go outside. she also felt compelled to tell me about it but brushed it off.
she joined me outside. i placed the twig where i had been shown (in this head shaped plant pot, now sans plant, that my ex boss gifted me after i announced i was quitting my job over anti-indigenous racism). we wandered over to a lil fire pit we have. and we chatted until the motion detecting flood light went out, and chatted some more in the dark beneath the stars.
where i was sitting, i could see orion's belt perfectly framed by inky pine branches against the bright night sky.
there were times E felt overwhelmed with sudden nervous energy while briefly loutside. then there were times i felt it too. anticipation for a massive change about to hit.
we thanked the stars. we thanked the night and the trees and the dirt and the creatures. and we both felt certain, in that moment, that everything was happening exactly as it needs to.
i don't know yet what it means. but i thought i should write it down.
the facts of the situation are that my roommate E went outside. then we both went outside and chatted for a few minutes. now we're inside again, though changed.
the messages of the day kinda go like this...
a few months ago my mom performed a limpia on me in my living room, waving an egg around my body to cleanse my spirit of whatever shouldn't be there. my friend A was there. as waves of discomfort overwhelmed my body and erupted out of me in shrieks and yelling and groans of irritation, whatever we are cleansing, it's stubborn and ingrown. even my mother was moved to vomiting into our toilet about it.
that's a new one. thank you~
halfway through, my mom points at A and without even looking towards them commands they get a twig from the backyard. Preferably with leaves. And don't kill anyone! A doesn't even miss a beat, immediately running outside easily understanding that they were meant to pick one already fallen and not harm a currently living plant.
after the ritual we thanked our perfect little twig volunteer. my mother told me to put it above my door and just say thank you to it when you think of it and get rid of it in a few days.
i am grateful. i did say thank you a few times. but i also totally forgot it there for months.
today. i am sitting on my bed playing phone games and winding down. it's 10 at night. the town is going to bed.
and my little twig gives me a ring.
i suddenly have the impulse to take the twig back outside finally. and i'm even told where to place her.
i ignore it for now because i have 30 seconds left of this level and it's beeping urgently at me and if it's important then i will still remember it in a bit hold on!
then i heard our backyard door open.
okay fine. message heard.
i did finish the level tho.
but i also call out to my roommate. i almost didn't. felt nonsensical maybe. turns out she also felt a seemingly out of nowhere urge to go outside. she also felt compelled to tell me about it but brushed it off.
she joined me outside. i placed the twig where i had been shown (in this head shaped plant pot, now sans plant, that my ex boss gifted me after i announced i was quitting my job over anti-indigenous racism). we wandered over to a lil fire pit we have. and we chatted until the motion detecting flood light went out, and chatted some more in the dark beneath the stars.
where i was sitting, i could see orion's belt perfectly framed by inky pine branches against the bright night sky.
there were times E felt overwhelmed with sudden nervous energy while briefly loutside. then there were times i felt it too. anticipation for a massive change about to hit.
we thanked the stars. we thanked the night and the trees and the dirt and the creatures. and we both felt certain, in that moment, that everything was happening exactly as it needs to.
